If you play music, you’re probably caught in the thrall of musical instruments. It’s an insidious thing and it sneaks up on you, and no one ever warns you. You take up playing music, for whatever reason. Maybe you just wanted to carry a tune, impress the girls, or find a way to express yourself. Your early years of your musical training, the instrument was just the tool to make music.
But if you stuck with it, you became aware that there are other instruments out there, and some are very desirable. Maybe you see a guitar at a jam session or a music store, and you think, I ought to have one like that. You deserve one like that. The criteria might just be looks – a beautiful shiny instrument, or maybe one that’s perfectly worn and full of charm. Or it might be a brand – a headstock you’d love to show off.
If you’re lucky, the instruments you covet won’t be expensive. However, as far as I can tell, this is rarely the case. So, once you get the fever, you save your pennies and eventually, you get that special axe. It’s a dream come true – it looks good, it plays good and it sounds great – you’re in seventh heaven! You may get years of enjoyment from that instrument. You’ll make beautiful music, sound better than ever and have a wonderful conversation piece.
Sadly, the feeling wears off. Just because you have that guitar of your dreams, you still notice others and gradually, you begin to covet another one. The cycle repeats itself. I know, because I have the malady: Instrument Acquisition Disorder, or IAD. There is no cure, except maybe going completely broke.
Fortunately, this disease is one that can be endured, if properly managed. One key to keeping the disease under control is to have a supportive spouse. If they understand the seriousness of the disease, they can help you by letting you know when your acquisition habits are getting out of hand. This can be done gently, by firm words, or more abruptly, with a rolling pin upside the head.
You can also help yourself by recognizing some of the triggers, and avoiding undue temptation. For instance, everybody else’s guitar will almost always seem to sound better than yours – this is an illusion. You can test this by having someone else play one of your instruments for a few songs. The instrument you were sure you needed to upgrade will suddenly sound better than ever before, and this may quell some of your cravings.
Properly managed, IAD can actually be a source of joy and satisfaction for many years. With a strong support system, it’s quite a lot of fun! So, there’s no race for the cure. Long live IAD – it’s time the world opened its eyes to this affliction.
