Recently I heard some chatter about a guy who was wreaking some havoc with guest spots at a regular jam session. I guess it wasn’t a jam session in the usual sense – this particular jam will feature five musicians thrown together for the night, and I guess that makes it sort of a “closed jam”. Nonetheless it’s not unusual for someone to show up with an instrument and sit in for a song or two.
Most times, this works out fine, and it doesn’t necessarily matter how skilled the guest is. The five musicians chosen for the night tend to be of a high quality, and can skillfully prop up a less-experienced player, to the delight of the guest and the audience alike. But occasionally, someone comes along that can’t, or won’t be propped up. They are, somehow, one-person jam-wreckers.
“He just lacks self-awareness”, one friend of mine said after witnessing one such unwitting sabotage. I think he hit the nail on the head.
We’ve all stumbled into jams that were way over our heads. (I actually enjoy doing this!). You hang on for dear life, and are grudgingly admitted, and you do your best. You get some good notes, cringe and apologize for the bad ones, and, after a song or two, you move on. You’re self aware – you know where your skills stack up against the players around you and you have every right to dip your toes in that water. But you know when to make the graceful exit, before you have a deleterious effect on the jam.
Some people never develop that sense. They gleefully pound away in a jam, and, within minutes, everyone starts to wander away. They have no awareness of how they affect those around them.
This is similar to the folks who will wander through a parking lot and care not a whit which vehicles have started up and begun the back up. They pay no attention to the back-up lights and blissfully wander behind moving vehicles. Yes, they have the right of way, but you need to be aware of what’s going on around you, if only for self preservation.
People wandering around looking at their phones or with earphones on have willfully surrendered any pretense of self-awareness. If you want to stay locked into your own world, that’s fine – but do it somewhere where you won’t interact with anybody else.
I’ve seen people hiking through the woods with earphones on. Is there a better music than the wind in the trees and the birds chirping? Not only that, but you need all your available senses to avoid a rattlesnake or a skunk, for heaven’s sake!
